Motivating a Teen With Monetary & Material Rewards

Reasoning Rather Than Rewarding

• A 13- or 14-year-old overweight adolescent may be happy to get off the couch and take a walk with you if she's paid for it. However, by age 15, reasoning with your teen is a more appropriate motivational approach, HealthyChildren.org says. For instance, talking to your overweight teen about the negative health effects and social rejection he may encounter due to his weight may be a stronger motivator than paying him $10 when he drops five pounds. Offering your support by saying "We'll work together on your weight loss" can help keep him motivated to shed the excess pounds.

Intrinsic Versus Extrinsic Motivation

• Doing something for the sole purpose of feeling good about it is referred to as intrinsic motivation. Running a mile without stopping or clearing out and organizing a cluttered room provides a feeling of accomplishment. Extrinsic motivation is inspired by outside influences such as a promise of new jeans, sneakers or money if a certain task is completed. Regularly rewarding your teen with material rewards prevents her from learning how to self-motivate with internal rewards like pride, the website Dr.Phil.com explains.

Expert Insight

• Motivating your teen with monetary or material rewards can backfire if it makes your child feel that he's backed into a corner. A teen may rebel if the promise of a reward is perceived as threat -- "Do this or else" -- if he doesn't follow through on a particular request. Present extrinsic motivation in a gentler, more empathetic manner by saying something like "Please help me understand how you feel about this so we talk it over come up with a solution," psychologist Carl Pickhardt advises in an article published in "Psychology Today" in May 2010. Your teen may be more willing to cooperate when he feels less controlled and more the focus of concern -- but there's no guarantee such tactics will work, adds Pickhardt.

Changing Tactics

• You can change your motivational style at any time even if you've spent years handing over cash or material items in exchange for a good report card. Tell your teen he's old enough to act responsibly about homework, grades and other areas, such as making curfew. Reassure him that you are confident in his academic skills or other abilities. Switching gears may take a little getting used to for both you and your teen. In the long run, your supportive words instead of cash or rewards may prove to be the ultimate gift to your teen.