How to End Teen Curfew Battles

The teen years are a time when both children and parents are learning how to let go. While you're just trying to keep your child safe, enforcing curfews can make him feel you're trying to cramp his style. According to the Brigham Young University School of Education, maintaining flexibility is key when attempting to end teen curfew battles. Letting your child know you trust him -- provided he earns that trust -- can help ease the tension.

Instructions

    • 1

      Explain to your child that you set a curfew because you love her and want her to be safe. As long as she is able to respond calmly, listen to her side as well. You don't have to agree to her requests, but hear her out when she behaves, and refuse to engage when she doesn't.

    • 2

      Write up a contract that you both sign. Explain the rewards for meeting the curfew and the consequences of breaking it. If your teen knows that breaking curfew means having to come home even earlier or not being allowed to go out at all, she might be less inclined to do battle.

    • 3

      Negotiate curfew only after your teen has come home on time and without argument for a substantial period. Let him know you will not negotiate on the spot, on the phone or by text message. In other words, if he wants a later curfew, make him earn it.

    • 4

      Combat arguments that everyone else's parents let them stay out later by talking to the parents. If she tells you her friends' parents let them stay out an hour later, ask the parents if this is true. If it is, consider allowing her to stay out later when she's with those friends and you know exactly where they'll be. This can be a good compromise on the road to a general curfew extension.

    • 5

      Make a list of the phone numbers of your teen's friends' parents. Tell him that if he misses curfew, you'll be worried about his safety and will start calling the numbers on the list. Explain that if you can't locate him, your next call will be to the police.

    • 6

      Set a good example. If your teen constantly sees you running late, he's less likely to take you seriously when you insist he come home on time.

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