How to Punish Kids for Bad Behavior in Front of Their Grandparents

Discipline in public is important to help your child understand what's acceptable and what isn't, but you want to keep it appropriate. This is especially difficult when grandparents are the audience because you don't want them to critique or question your parenting style. Punishing your child in front of her grandma and grandpa is tricky, but it can put a stop to undesired behaviors.

Instructions

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      Stay calm, advises child psychiatrist Michael Kaplan on The Family Groove website. Over-reacting out only serves to make you look bad and might scare your child or make the grandparents uncomfortable. Instead, take a deep breath and pull yourself together before handing out a punishment.

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      Use a firm, but neutral voice. Don't scream or yell, but let your child know that his behavior is unacceptable without upsetting grandma and grandpa with your reaction. Simply tell your child to stop what he's doing and remove him from the circumstances.

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      Allow for natural consequences. Maybe your child's grandma asked her not to play near the china cabinet. If she chooses not to listen and breaks a valuable dish, she's faced with the consequence of buying her grandparents a new bowl or working off the cost by doing chores around the house.

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      Stay consistent, suggests the Healthy Children website, published by the American Academy of Pediatrics. If the rules at home mean no jumping on the furniture or not being allowed in the front yard without an adult, stick to them at grandma and grandpa's house. If you let your kids break the rules sometimes, they get the message that you won't enforce consequences in certain circumstances, which makes it hard to refrain when they're at home.

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      Enforce a time-out. This is effective for kids from the toddler age to those in grade school, according to KidsHealth, and is particularly effective if they're having fun with their grandparents and must stop and leave the activity. If behavior gets out of hand, have your child move to a chair in another room or take a break outside the store or restaurant.

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      Remove privileges. Even if you're not at home, the threat of losing privileges is often enough to keep kids in line when you're out and about with the grandparents. Let your child know beforehand that unacceptable behavior will result in loss of television or computer time, an early bedtime or skipping the trip to the library he's been looking forward to.

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