Kids Who Need Constant Reassurance of Love

Unconditional

• Parents might be unconsciously establishing norms of conditional versus unconditional love at home, making kids feel as though they need reassurance that they are cared for and loved. Conditional love can have a negative effect on children, according to the University of Missouri Extension. Children might fear that the relationship will end and think of the world as an insecure place. It can also cause feelings of competition and inadequacy. In contrast, when kids experience unconditional love, they feel safe and validated in their relationships. Children feel confident about themselves, ready to focus on their strengths and to cooperate with others. Parents might evaluate whether their love has strings attached, or whether children might benefit from hearing that they̵7;re loved ̶0;no matter what.̶1;

Moodiness

• Needing constant reassurance could be a cyclical activity associated with moodiness. When kids feel displeasure, they sometimes express these feelings by pouting, whining or sulking, according to Empowering Parents.com. Parents sometimes unknowingly feed into these sometimes-frustrating cycles by reacting to them. When children act needy or whiny, resist reacting emotionally because that reinforces the moody behavior. Instead, calmly state that although you love him, he needs to stop whining because you can̵7;t fully understand what he needs when he speaks in that tone.

Attention

• Sometimes kids who need constant reassurance of love really want attention. All children deserve positive, loving attention, but parents can help set up appropriate boundaries in order to help teach independence, according to psychologist Sylvia Rimm, writing for Creators.com. One-on-one attention, especially at bedtime, can help remind a child that he is loved and valued. Praise your child when you observe independent behaviors to encourage repeated actions. Kids who love attention might also benefit from participating in programs related to drama, the arts or sports.

Anxiety

• It̵7;s possible that children requiring constant reassurance are struggling with anxiety, according to the Child Mind Institute. Kids might not feel safe, comforted, or secure in themselves and so turn to parents for reassurance. Specific triggers or fears might stir anxiety, and a therapist or doctor can help parents and children develop a treatment plan that will safely help children build resilience until they require less reassurance. In cases where a disorder is present, parents might be unintentionally worsening the problem by providing reassurance without seeking professional assistance.