Task Avoidance Behavior in Children

The Process Is the Goal

• A child who continually hears his parents criticize others for not being the best at something can quickly develop task avoidance behaviors. Not attempting the task at all will prevent him from failing in their eyes. According to a report a team of researchers, led by Jeanne Friedel, and published by the University of Michigan, children who believe their parents place more emphasis on mastering the skill than the process of learning are inclined to display task avoidance behaviors. Children who witness their parents and other authority figures in their lives concentrate more on improvement with each task attempt, rather than on being the best from the start, learn valuable lessons about perseverance and the importance of the process itself.

Building Self-Confidence

• Allowing a child to continually avoid new tasks creates a cycle of avoidance. Children will sometimes avoid tasks to protect their self-worth, according to Friedel and her team. To build his self-worth, he should be encouraged to attempt new tasks, be praised for his efforts and be encouraged to keep moving through the process. Children who lack confidence may be defensive or get emotional when given constructive guidance; however, allowing them to stop midtask reinforces their belief that they cannot succeed. Emphasizing the importance of completion, over speed or being the best, helps the child focus on completing tasks, which builds important skills he will need as an adult.

Increasing Motivation to Complete Tasks

• When a task is boring, difficult or otherwise undesirable, a child's natural behavior is to avoid it. Teaching a child how to self-reward for completing undesirable tasks helps boost his confidence and self-reliance. For example, let him choose what reward he will have for completing his homework. It may be 10 minutes on a gaming system, choosing what the family has for dinner or getting to walk the dog. Provide him with several options and let him choose the light at the end of the tunnel for difficult task completion.

Decreasing Avoidance

• Turning attention elsewhere when a new task is introduced passively allows the child to avoid the new task. For example, he quickly opens a favorite book and begins reading when he sees the teacher approaching with a new math work sheet to complete. Recognizing this behavior allows adults to help the child remain focused on the new task at hand. Encouraging him to ask questions and process what is being asked of him will help him understand what he needs to do. Frequent praises and words of encouragement also give him reasons to move through the process.