How to Help Kids Adjust After a Visitation

For divorced parents, visitation can seem like a necessary evil. It is important for children to spend time with both parents, but transitioning from one home to another on a regular basis can be difficult on the kids. Different bedrooms, schedules and house rules can create unnecessary stress for a child who has two homes. Helping your child adjust after a visitation can ease tension and help him relax back into his daily routine.

Instructions

    • 1

      Give your child the opportunity to transition mentally and physically from visiting the other parent. Ask if she would like you to pick her up at a different location, such as her school or a restaurant. Advise your child approximately an hour before it is time to go so she can mentally prepare for the transition. Give her time and space, or the extra hugs that she needs.

    • 2

      Provide a window of time for your child to adjust to being home again. Give him the space to cry or vent his emotions before leaving to run errands or having dinner. Sympathize with how difficult the transition can feel to your child, even after years of a visitation schedule.

    • 3

      Encourage your child to talk about the time she spent with her other parent, without sounding like you are trying to get information on your ex. Let her express how she feels about going back and forth for visitation. Assure your child of your unconditional love and loyalty, regardless of changes in your personal life, such as a romantic relationship or new step-children.

    • 4

      Let your child know that he has two homes, not one home and just another house to visit. Work with the other parent to ensure that both spaces are comfortable, safe and have everything your child needs while living there. Make a plan with the other parent to create a smooth and calm transition between your homes.

    • 5

      Pursue professional counseling or speak to your pediatrician if your child continues to have difficulty adapting after visitations. Discover if she is struggling emotionally or if something more serious is happening.

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