Emotional Immaturity in Toddlers

Build Emotional Awareness

• The children̵7;s development website Zero to Three reports that your toddler needs help managing the strong emotions that she may be experiencing for the first time. Developing a self-awareness about powerful emotions is a first step in learning to manage emotions in a socially appropriate manner for your toddler. For example, you might suggest to your toddler who struggles with sharing, ̶0;You felt angry when Chad wanted to play with the blue truck, because it is your favorite. Would you like me to push you on the swing until it is your turn to play with the truck?̶1; Helping your toddler identify her emotions prepares a foundation for acquiring self-control.

Encourage Communication of Emotions

• Not only does your toddler struggle to identify and regulate her developing emotions, but she also experiences problems with communicating these emotions to others. When your toddler̵7;s strong, immature emotions cannot be expressed through her language skills, the consequence can be behavioral dilemmas. As your toddler̵7;s language skills continue to grow, she will eventually talk about her emotions with little difficulty. Until then, help your toddler to learn how to express her emotions by talking about your own feelings and exploring feelings of characters in her books.

Incorporate Choices Into the Daily Routine

• A toddler̵7;s developing emotions frequently coincide with a limited tolerance for frustration. PBS recommends that parents build their toddler̵7;s tolerance for frustration by integrating reasonable, age-appropriate choices into daily routines. For example, if your toddler usually responds with an angry tirade when you announce nap time, you might say, ̶0;I know that you do not like to leave your toys at nap time. Select one of your toys to ̵6;nap̵7; with you.̶1; Or, if your toddler̵7;s morning routine is problematic, permit her to make choices related to breakfast or clothing. Knowing that choices exist empowers your toddler and helps to minimize frustration.

Provide Support and Positive Attention

• The National Association for the Education of Young Children reminds parents that their loving support and positive attention nurtures their toddler̵7;s emotional development. For example, when you catch your toddler in the act of being appropriate and praise her behavior, you build your toddler̵7;s confidence that she can be emotionally successful. Loving support includes presenting a positive role model and demonstrating the types of behavior you want your toddler to emulate. Your toddler learns that she can regulate her emotions when she observes that you consistently respond with love and encouragement.