Ungratefulness in Teens

Stretch for Independence

• As teenagers move toward independence, a certain amount of attitude is par for the course, advises author Mark Gregston, owner of Heartlight, a teen residential counseling center. This attitude may sound and act like ingratitude when you receive it from your teenager. In reality, however, the teenager may be reacting to a quest for independence by bristling about interference and gestures provided by parents.

Taking a Step Back

• Instead of overreacting to ungrateful behavior from your teenager, step back and give your teenager a little space. If you have been hovering or interfering too much, your teenager may react with remarks that sound ungrateful and rebellious. It may be helpful to allow your teenager to make decisions, even if she makes mistakes. It can also be helpful to turn a blind eye to insignificant remarks ̵1; even when they̵7;re annoying. The more attention you give them, the more power they have.

Modeling Behavior

• When you want your teenager to exhibit an attitude of gratitude, model the behavior you want to see, suggests Adina Soclof, who has a master's in social work, with the Orthodox Union website. Kids often look to parents to learn how to interact with others and to adopt the morals and values of the parent. When you display a grateful attitude toward others, showing your appreciation and thankfulness, your child is more likely to emulate your behavior.

Wait it Out

• Although you may need to take a deep breath and accept a little attitude and ungrateful behavior during adolescence, the good news is that this phase ends. As challenging as this can be, look ahead to the point when your child matures to the point where she appreciates the efforts and assistance of others. By remaining steadfast, continuing to impart your values and modeling positive behavior, eventually, your child̵7;s grateful attitude should reappear in her actions and demeanor.