How to Help Christian Teens Grieve

Teenagers realize that no one lives forever, but they don̵7;t usually expect people they know and love to die. Religion offers some comfort for grieving teens and it may help them make sense of their losses, but it doesn̵7;t take away the pain of losing a loved one. Christian teens grieve just like teens of other faiths and they also often need the support and guidance of caring adults to help them through a very difficult time.

Instructions

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      Understand that while their faith may comfort them during their times of sorrow, Christian teens still grieve. They still miss their lost loved ones. Avoid suggesting that they shouldn̵7;t feel sad because their loved ones are with God now or because their deaths were God̵7;s will. Pastor Mike Andrews, director of the Evangelical Alliance for Renewal in Mansfield, Ohio, points out, ̶0;Even Jesus grieved. When he learned that Lazarus had died, he wept.̶1;

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      Encourage teens to express their feelings and reassure them that their feelings are acceptable. Teens often experience a wide range of emotions, including sadness, anger, anxiety, fear and even guilt, after the loss of loved ones.

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      Encourage Christian teens to turn to their faith for comfort. Some teens find prayer immensely comforting. Offer to pray with them and also encourage them to pray alone. Reading the Bible also offers comfort to many teens. Pastor Andrews suggests the following Bible verses for grieving teens: Ecclesiastes 3:1-2, John 14:1-4, Revelation 21:4, and Romans 8:38-39.

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      Expect teenagers to ask difficult questions. They may ask if their loved ones who weren̵7;t Christians or didn̵7;t attend church regularly went to heaven, for example. Pastor Andrews suggests answering that question by explaining that it is impossible to know what was in someone̵7;s heart before they died so there is no way to know for certain if they went to heaven. He continues, ̶0;God is smarter than people and God is always merciful, so He will work things out in the best possible way, even if we don̵7;t know what that way is or can̵7;t understand it right now.̶1; If your teen asks a question you don̵7;t know how to answer, admit you don̵7;t know. Suggest your teen speak to a pastor or other spiritual advisor for more guidance.

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