How to Get a Teen's Attention

Despite your best efforts, your teen might not appear to be that interested when you try to communicate. Teens tend to be distracted by a variety of issues, including relationships, friendships, academic concerns, technology and extracurricular activities. Your teen probably spends a lot of time multitasking, performing activities such as texting, watching TV, eating and studying all at the same time. For many teens, this is normal behavior, says Licensed Counselor Yshai Boussi in an article for Portland Family Counseling. Sometimes, however, you'll need your teen to pay total attention to what you're saying.

Instructions

    • 1

      Ask your teen to turn off all distractions, such as televisions, smartphones, media players and computers. If you need your teen's undivided attention to discuss something serious or important, you'll need to eliminate external distractions -- but try to do so in a positive way. Let her know that you'd like to speak with her for a certain amount of time, after which she may continue her previous activities.

    • 2

      Avoid negativity and guilt trips when you request your teen's attention. In an article for Aha! Parenting, Clinical Psychologist Laura Markham points out that inviting a positive response is easier -- and more likely to be successful -- than trying to guilt your teen into doing something you want. For example, say something along the lines of "I was hoping we could spend some time together this weekend" instead of "You never pay attention to anything I say."

    • 3

      Approach your teen with a friendly attitude and offer choices. If you want to speak to her about something specific, ask her when might be a good time for her schedule. If you want her to accompany to to the store, ask her if she has time. Don't give her an ultimatum or demand that she pays attention to you. Forcing her to pay attention can create resistance instead of your desired reaction. Give her options -- she might be more likely to give you her attention when you need and want it most.

    • 4

      Express your concerns and wishes in a clear, easily understandable manner. Just because your teen seems to be paying attention and nods his head doesn't mean that he's actually heard what you've said. Ask your teen to repeat what you've said so you can be sure that you're both on the same page.

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