How to Respond to Money Requests from Tweens and Teens

Ask your teen or tween what she intends to do with the money. A simple, respectfully asked question may be enough to make her think twice about her purchase. She may feel silly asking for your money to buy a new video game. On the other hand, you may be surprised to find your child intends the money for a charitable giving campaign at school. Keep your tone respectful. The goal of the question is to initiate a conversation.

Call a budget meeting. Most children have only a vague sense of adult financial responsibilities. Showing your child exactly where your paycheck goes, including groceries, bills and insurance, may give him a better sense of the value of money. Explain that, while it would be nice to give him everything he wants, your primary responsibility as a parent is caring for his needs.

Offer the opportunity to earn some money. Some parents choose to give a weekly allowance based on the completion of a list of chores. Another option is to compensate your child for a big project, such as organizing the attic or painting the shed. Tweens and teens are old enough to contribute meaningfully to the running of the household. Give your child challenging tasks she will take pride in completing.

Be consistent. Talk to your partner and decide together how to compensate your child and when to give him money. If you've decided you'll only hand out money on birthdays and Christmas, don't hand your child a few bills when he begs for field trip cash.

Set clear rules. If you've been loose with money before, you can expect resistance from your tween or teen when the cash flow stops. Set up a meeting with your child to discuss finances. Keep the presentation based on the facts of your family's finances and end with the rules of money flow for the future. When your child asks for money, ask her to repeat the rules and answer her own question.