How to Live With Grown Stepchildren

Marrying someone with children can be a difficult situation, and if the children are already grown, the situation can be even more complicated. Adult stepchildren can create friction in a new marriage, especially if they still live at home. If you become a stepparent to an adult child, you should set some boundaries and ask for certain things from the adult child to create the best blended home you can.

Instructions

    • 1

      Demand respect. Even if the stepchild is close to your age, he should treat you with respect. If the stepchild doesn't give you respect, have your spouse talk with him.

    • 2

      Set a plan for the future. Decide with your spouse how long the stepchild is allowed to live at home and if he is expected to pay rent. Decide what household chores should be the stepchild's responsibility.

    • 3

      Be civil and respectful. Your new adult stepchildren may resist your new relationship, but that doesn't give you an excuse to be mean. You are all part of a family now, and each member deserves respect.

    • 4

      Find common ground. Your stepchildren may not like the changes you bring to the family, especially if they have been living at home for a while before you married their parent. Don't try to make too many drastic changes right away, as this may cause friction with your new stepchildren.

    • 5

      Be confident. No matter how old your adult stepchildren are, you and your spouse should talk through house rules and expectations and stick to them. Your stepchild may start to lose respect for you if you don't stick to the things you say.

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