Creative Discipline Strategies for Inappropriate Talking

Talking back is a normal part of a child's development, but keeping the habit at bay requires discipline strategies that get your child to think twice before speaking rudely. According to "Psychology Today," many parents resort to restricting their children's social activities knowing that their power of permission is amplified by their power to restrict. Applying unexpected restrictions to everyday conveniences can also play an effective role in keeping the back-talk to a minimum.

  1. Withdraw Your Attention

    • According to Randy L. Cale, Ph.D. at Terrific Parenting, when you actively discipline your child for having a bad attitude or talking back, you are giving the bad behavior your attention and teaching him that the world cares about his attitude. In the adult world, people don't care about mending another person's bad attitude. They ignore the behavior and consequently, the individual. Ignoring your child's back-talk and refusing to engage in verbal combat teaches him that his behavior will neither illicit the response he's looking for nor will it solve any problems in a productive manner. He may soon realize that the only other option is talking in a reasonable and respectful way.

    Choose Your Punishment

    • Have your children make a list of specific household projects or tasks they can choose from to complete as punishment for inappropriate talking. One verbal infraction necessitates completion of one chore from the list. Not only will your children feel they have some control over the consequences for back-talking, they'll simultaneously begin to gain control over their tone, attitude and choice of words.

    Put a Price on Back-Talking

    • Your children can pay for their inappropriate talking by surrendering small tokens you can make and design as representations of lost privileges. For example, one token can represent a day of suspended electronic privileges while another may represent the loss of telephone time for two hours. Keep the time periods noted on the tokens for lost privileges reasonable. The point is to instill understanding that a poor attitude and back-talking is something that affects others as well as himself.

    Visual Reminder

    • Children sometimes say cruel things during heat of the moment. Teach yours how to control the impulse for back-talking with a visual reminder of the last negative dialogue. Have your child write on a chalkboard or dry-erase board the worst of what he said to you after a disagreement. Once he's had some time to cool down, his words may look and feel inappropriate to him. Have him "erase" the words and replace them with better ones. Let the new set of words become a positive reminder that respectful communication is more effective than anger and criticism. Keep the activity going consistently as a hands-on solution for reducing the frequency of inappropriate talking.

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