Child Discipline Vs. Abuse

Definitions of Discipline

• Pediatric experts at keepkidshealthy.com define discipline as the process of teaching children to know right from wrong. The goal of discipline is to raise a well-adjusted child, one who makes responsible decisions, has strong social skills and respects rules and order.

  Discipline includes a balance of corrective action (punishment) when the child does wrong and positive reinforcement (rewards) when the child does right. Corrective action includes careful criticism of the child's actions, grounding or "time out." Spanking and paddling are controversial forms of corrective action, but in most cases they are not considered abuse.

  Experts from the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry recommend that parents speak in measured, calm voices and speak as they would want to be spoken to--no insults, no name-calling.

Definitions of Abuse and Neglect

• Legal definitions of abuse vary from state to state, but according to the federal Child Welfare Information Gateway, child abuse and neglect is any act (or failure to act) that causes or presents a risk of serious harm. Abuse is separated into two categories-- emotional and physical.

Physical Abuse

• The Federal Child Welfare Information Gateway defines physical child abuse as causing a child injury through punching, kicking, throwing, burning, using a switch or strap, or inflicting harm in some other way. It does not matter whether the caregiver intended to hurt the child.

  Traditional physical discipline such as spanking generally is not considered abuse as long as it is reasonable and the child is not injured.

Emotional Abuse

• Emotional abuse is broader than physical abuse, and it involves doing things that hinder a child's self-esteem but do not necessarily cause physical harm, according to the Federal Child Welfare Information Gateway. Emotional abuse includes unreasonable amounts of criticism, making physical threats, and withholding love, support and guidance. Because its symptoms are almost purely psychological, it is difficult to prove and for social-service agencies to intervene.

What's The Difference?

• In drawing the line between discipline and abuse, it comes down to a question of harm. If the action causes the child physical or emotional harm, it almost certainly is child abuse. If it does not cause the child physical or emotional harm, it probably is not.