How Fathers Build Self-Esteem in Children

Being Good Role Models

• According to Kids Health, one of the ways dads influence their children̵7;s self-esteem is by being a good role model in that respect. Dads who model confidence and good self-esteem for their kids are actually fostering the same good qualities in their kids. For example, a dad who shows confidence in his abilities, and is optimistic and enthusiastic about life, is teaching his child to have the same values. A dad who is harsh on himself, criticizes himself often and shows little confidence in his own abilities is teaching those values to his children.

Take Emotion Out

• One way that a father can help to build his child̵7;s self-esteem is to take emotion out of the equation when it comes to discipline, advises Jeffrey Bernstein, Ph.D., licensed psychologist writing on the "Psychology Today" website. When a father appears controlling and not understanding, it can have a negative effect on his child̵7;s self-esteem. Fathers who remain calm when disciplining their children are less likely to be considered controlling. Yelling and screaming do not help to teach children how to behave appropriately, nor are they practices that build their self-esteem.

Encouraging Words

• Dads who use encouraging words when speaking to their kids typically have children with good self-esteem. According to Kids Health, when a child is frustrated or stuck in the middle of doing something that isn̵7;t going well, a little praise and encouragement can give him the motivation to carry on and succeed. For example, a dad who tells his son it̵7;s OK to strike out in the middle of a ballgame because no one is perfect is setting his son up to do better next time. Telling him that it shouldn̵7;t have happened and that he has to get better at the game will not only lower his self-esteem; it will likely ensure that the child does not improve.

Affection

• It is a pretty big misconception that dads are not affectionate. Many fathers are very affectionate, and spontaneous and consistent displays of affection are a great way dads can build their kids̵7; self-esteem, according to Kids Health. Knowing he is loved and feeling secure in his relationship with his dad can do wonders for a kid̵7;s self-esteem. For example, a kid whose dad hugs him and tells him he̵7;s proud of him is more likely to have a good level of confidence than a child whose father is distant and not affectionate.