How to Survive Empty Nest Syndrome

Empty nest syndrome begins the moment you realize it's time to say goodbye to your children as children and hello to them as adults. This is a painful process for many parents and it often comes as bit of a shock when it hits. We become so caught up in the day to day business of raising our children that we wake up one day to realize they are leaving home and life will never be quite the same.


Surviving Empty Nest depends on understanding that it is a transition like any other in life. It is an end, but it is also a beginning. It is a beginning that can lead to some of the best years of your life.


There are some things you can do to help you through this life transition so that you will come through it without prolonged difficulty.

Instructions

    • 1

      TAKE TIME TO GRIEVE

      You just said goodbye to your last child as you left them on the steps of their college dorm. Your heart is breaking and you want to turn back and rescue him/her from all the dangers that you fear lay awaiting them. Or you may heave a sigh of relief as you pull out of the driveway, glad to have them safely deposited and eager to start their new life. You don't feel all that sad...yet.

      Sooner or later, you will probably begin to feel the "quiet", the space in your life created when your last child left home. Empty nesters frequently look forward to those days before hand but are surprised to find that instead of enjoying the peace and quiet, they feel lost and uncertain. Life has changed.

      It is a time of transition and time to grieve the loss of your previous life as you knew it. Part of that grieving process is coming to terms with lost opportunities as a parent. It's okay to be sad, to cry, to feel lost. Giving yourself the time and space to grieve the loss of your life as a full time parent will help create the space where you will begin to create your new life.

    • 2

      USE YOUR SUPPORT SYSTEM

      During any time of transition, it is really helpful to turn to a support system. Friends, extended family, church and community friends can provide the help you need as you let go of your life as a parent and say hello to your life as an empty nester. Get together with friends for lunch or coffee and take advantage of your "extra" time.

    • 3

      LEARN SOMETHING NEW

      Now that you have a little free time as an empty nester, both in your day and in your mind, learn something new. Take up a new hobby, take a class or learn a language. Putting your energy into learning something you always thought you wanted to learn will not only be enjoyable, it will take your mind off the empty nest. It's one of the first steps you'll take to reinvent your life.

    • 4

      KEEP BUSY

      Keeping busy during life transitions can give you the time you need to get used to the changes in your life. Your psyche needs time to adjust to the empty nest and because a part of this transition is having a little extra time on your hands, it's a great time to begin doing some volunteer work or cleaning out cluttered closets or re-decorating a room or two in your house.

    • 5

      RECONNECT WITH YOUR SPOUSE

      In all the craziness of raising our children, we sometimes lose track of our most important relationship and support person...our spouse. Don't be surprised if you feel a bit like strangers when you find yourself alone together again. Take some time to talk together about things you used to do together that you put aside while the kids were around or things you might like to do together in the future. Begin to reinvent your life as a couple.

      Reconnecting with your spouse may be the best part of becoming a empty nester.

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