What Can Kids Do When They're Scared at Night?

One of the most important things you can give your child is a sense of security, along with the knowledge and skills to deal with stress and fears. Kids who waked up scared at night need to learn coping mechanisms so they are able to calm themselves down and fall back to sleep, without always needing mom or dad to come help them through it. Talk with your child, acknowledge her fears and work with her to come up with techniques she can use to conquer her fears and calm her nighttime anxieties.

  1. Scare-Free Zone

    • Kids can get scared by unfamiliar surroundings, scary TV shows or simply their own imaginations. Avoid some of these potential fears by making anti-scare tactics part of your child's bedtime routine. Show her there are no monsters in the closet or under the bed. Keep water in a plain spray bottle labeled "monster spray" and spritz some around her room before bed, assuring her the spray keeps all scary things away. And keep your child away from potentially stressful TV shows or scary movies, especially at bedtime. Read kid-friendly or comforting stories as part of your child's bedtime ritual, or sing soothing songs to her.

    Lights and Sounds

    • If your child tends to wake up during the night because he's afraid of something, take him to pick out a cheerful, friendly night light for his room. The National Sleep Foundation recommends that you plug it in in his room in a location he can easily see from his bed and remind him to look for it if he awakens during the night to reassure himself he's safe and sound in his own room. Or get your child a stuffed animal that lights up or shines patterns on the ceiling to break up the darkness. Music also works, especially if the child can turn it on himself and hum along to soothe himself.

    Read a Book

    • If calming reading is part of the bedtime routine already, consider letting your child read to herself in bed for short periods so she can calm down and relax after waking up scared. If you're concerned that she'll read too long and not get enough sleep, set a timer for a short, predetermined amount of time so she'll know when to put her book away. Another alternative is to agree you'll read one short story to her if she wakes up scared, as long as it doesn't happen too often. Consider Martin Waddell's "Can't You Sleep, Little Bear?" or the perennial favorite by Margaret Wise Brown, "Good Night, Moon."

    Comfort from Mom

    • You want your child to learn to comfort himself and be able to fall asleep on his own, but every now and then, only a hug from mom or dad will do the trick. Limit such visits to occasions when your child has tried repeatedly -- and failed -- to get himself back to sleep. If the child has witnessed a frightening event on the news or in person, such as a car crash, or if the family is in the midst of great stress, psychologist Aletha Solter of the Aware Parenting Institute suggests your presence might be necessary to reassure and comfort him and help him get back to sleep.

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