How to Stop a Tantrum

It might build out of sniffles and whines or explode out of nowhere. It might be caused by frustration, exhaustion or a desperate desire for another cookie. But once a tantrum begins, all you can think about is making it stop. Tantrums are unpleasant but normal, especially in young children who don't have much control over their lives and bodies. You should allow some tantrums to run their course, but, when the situation calls for your involvement, take a few deep breaths. Employing compassion and quick thinking should end the outburst almost as quickly as it began.

Instructions

    • 1

      Identify the cause of the tantrum. Sometimes it will be obvious, but that's not always true with younger children. Ask Dr. Sears suggests responding with empathy to tantrums caused by frustration. Ask your child why he's upset, or take a guess if he's too hysterical to speak. Use a calm voice to say something like "Are you upset because your sister wouldn't play with you?"

    • 2

      Assist your child with the task that's frustrating her or offer an alternative. Say that, though she's too small to walk the dog herself, she may hold onto the leash. Or, sit down to help her rebuild her fallen block tower.

    • 3

      Distract a child who continues to tantrum, suggests HealthyChildren.org. Pick him up and carry him outdoors for a walk, lead him to a different room or engage him in a new activity. If he's starting to calm down, pick a soothing activity, such as reading a book together. If he's still agitated, turn on dance music or play a game that involves running around the yard to help him blow off some steam.

    • 4

      Take your child to a designated timeout spot if no other attempts have calmed her or if she's flailing so wildly she could endanger herself or others. Sit with her on a low stool or step. Say something like "You are not able to control your body right now. You need to sit here until you are calm." Stay with her for a few minutes or until her tantrum is over.

    • 5

      Talk to your child about whatever sparked the tantrum. Say you understand sometimes it is hard to be calm, but screaming and kicking is never OK. Suggest ways he can handle similar situations in the future, such as by taking a few deep breaths or asking an adult for help.

    2. Previous:No

    Next:

    • How to Have Measurable Goals for Troubled Kids
      A wise person once said, "You eat an elephant the same way you eat a cheeseburger: one bite at a time." If youre parenting or mentoring a troubled child, you already know it isnt easy. One skill that can help put both you and your child on
    • Emotional Histrionics
      Q Im concerned about my seven-year-old. He always bothers both of his siblings -- my eight-year-old son and two-year-old daughter -- to the point where they start crying. He also makes weird annoying noises. Hes very emotional -- he always cries and
    • How to Make Your Discipline Consistent as a Parent
      No matter which of the five main types of discipline you use, it won’t work if you aren’t consistent. Consistency is one of the more important keys to addressing child behavior problems. Consistently setting limits, giving effective consequences