How to Help Children to Stop Screaming for What they Want

We've all seen kids scream when they don't get what they want, and it's annoying to those around them. But to parents, a screaming child can cause an instant spike in heart rate and blood pressure, as well as feelings of panic. After screaming episode parents torment themselves with questions like "What did I do wrong?" or "What's wrong with my child?" or "What must people think?" There's a few simple things every parent can do to end this behavior.

Things You'll Need

  • Patience
  • Family support
  • Professional guidance
  • Time
  • Endurance

Instructions

    • 1

      First, make sure your child's physical needs are being met. Is the child getting enough sleep? Children need more sleep than adults. Some children are chronically sleep deprived due to busy schedules, multiple caregivers, and even living in multiple households due to divorce. If your child has sleep problems, get help from a physician immediately.

    • 2

      Make sure that your child's diet is nutritious, and is not filled with processed foods, juices, and soft drinks. Be sure that your child is taking a multi vitamin, drinks enough water and milk, and eats a wide variety of proteins, fruits, and vegetables.

    • 3

      Make sure that your child's social needs are met. Does she have contact with other children? Do you spend at least one hour per day in intensive one-on-one interaction with him? If not, start playing with her daily, following her lead. Do not begin a new program of discipline without first making sure that you are invested in the relationship.

    • 4

      Once you have established that his basic needs have been met, it is time to look at behavior and consequences. First, be sure that you never reward your child's inappropriate screaming with an immediate response.

    • 5

      If your child is screaming to attain something that is unnecessary for his health or safety, then do not reward the screams by giving in. Tell him that because he screamed, he will not get it. Be patient when the tantrum increases, because it will. Take a moment to pray for patience. Do whatever it takes to remain calm. By being calm, you are showing the child that he does not have power over you. Sooner or later he will abandon screaming as a strategy, because he will see that it does not work.

    • 6

      If your child has been screaming for something that you were going to need to give her anyway (for her health or safety), then wait for a break in the tantrum. Act quickly! Give the necessary object and then say, "I see you are calmer now. You aren't screaming. Good job! Here is your...."

    • 7

      Give lots and lots of positive attention between screaming episodes. When you see him being patient, praise him. If your child is using good manners, say, "Wow! I like how quiet you were when I was on the phone with grandma" or "I like how you waited patiently for you cake."

    • 8

      Understand that changing any behavior is a very long process, and undesirable behavior WILL probably increase in frequency and intensity as you begin your new discipline program. Be consistent for several months.

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