Should Bullying Be Addressed by Parents?
While you hope it never happens to your child, chances are that it might -- in a poll by the Nemours Foundation, nearly half of kids said they had been bullied, while 22 percent admitted to being the bullies themselves. As a parent, bullying should be in the forefront of your parental consciousness, but that doesn't mean you'll always know when and how to step in to help. By ensuring that you address bullying as a preventive method at home, you can give your child the tools he needs to come to you if bullying becomes a problem.
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Parental Effect
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Parents can actually prevent bullying from ever affecting kids by starting in the home. According to Dr. Nancy S. Buck in an article on the "Psychology Today" website, it's up to parents to not control their children, but to give them the tools necessary to control themselves. Whether that means teaching tolerance in the home or learning to report bullying when it happens, you can give your child more control over a bullying situation regardless of whether he's the bully or the bullied. Your attitude and tolerance level toward bullying can have a profound effect on your child's.
When to Step In
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One of your duties as a parent is to know when to step in and get involved when bullying is present. According to the National Education Association, the answer is: immediately. A no-tolerance attitude toward bullying tells your child that you take the behavior seriously. What's more, it gives you the opportunity to step in and address a small bullying problem before it becomes a huge issue. As soon as you notice a problem, talk to your child, address other authorities and do whatever you can to make the behavior stop.
What to Do
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Once you recognize that bullying is an issue and make the decision to step in, you'll need to have a game plan in place to actually address the issue. Of course, the plan should be commensurate to what's taking place. If you notice that your child is part of a group that teases another child, for instance, it may be time to have a discussion on bullying and the negative effects. If your child is the one being bullied, it may mean talking to school administration or other parents to stop the behavior.
The University of Florida Extension also encourages teaching your child conflict management skills so he has the tools to address bullies when you're not present, abilities such as finding a teacher, not engaging in bullying or being open-minded about differences.
Involving Others
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You don't have to shoulder the burden of bullying all on your own. When necessary, it's completely appropriate to involve others who can help stop bullying. "Bullying: What Parents Can Do About It," an online bulletin created by two professionals with the Penn State College of Agricultural Sciences Agricultural Research and Cooperative Extension, suggests acting as an advocate for your child, which can mean alerting administrators or even approaching the parents of a bully. By getting other responsible adults on board, you address bullying in a way that escalates the issue and involves those who need to know and who have the power to make the bullying stop.
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