Sibling Rivalry Characteristics

Sibling rivalry is an uncomfortable and unavoidable reality for most parents. The Kid's Health website reports that it often begins even before the second child is born, and continues as children grow and compete against each other. A child may compare himself to his siblings and attempt to direct his parent's attention away from them and onto himself. Sibling rivalry is often caused by a child's desire to feel loved and noticed.

  1. Possessiveness

    • A child in rivalry with her siblings may be especially possessive of certain items, particularly ones she sees as belonging to her. Kid's Health states that toddlers, for example, are naturally possessive of their belongings and will assert their will at every opportunity. A school-aged child has a strong concept of fairness and equality, and will feel angered if his sister attempts to take something that belongs to him and claim it as her own.

    Competition

    • The most obvious characteristic of sibling rivalry is that the siblings will always be in competition with one another. Kyla Boyse, a registered nurse, reports on the University of Michigan Health System website that a child is competing to define who he is as an individual. As he explores hobbies and potential passions, he wants to separate himself from his siblings and show that he has his own set of interests, as well as his own identity.

    Jealousy

    • Sibling rivalry often manifests itself in the form of jealousy. As reported on the website of the Child Development Institute, an organization founded in 1999 and devoted to providing advice on parenting and child development, every child notices when his sibling gets attention and he does not. Furthermore, sex differences between siblings may lead to jealousy, as in the case where a boy feels jealous of the loving attention dad directs toward his sister; or when a girl wishes she could go on the hunting trip with her father and her older brother.

    Anger

    • Anger is a symptom of sibling rivalry, and can also be a lasting effect in some cases. PBSkids.org shares that siblings in rivalry may have regular fights and arguments, as well as give one another "the silent treatment" when each feels it is warranted. Unfortunately, these problems may have long-term results if the fighting is not resolved in childhood. Years of resentment may be the result if a child does not accept her sibling's differences and learns that he is not in competition for attention, love and acceptance.

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