When Do Kids Start Practicing Self Control?
Self-control is internal power and control exerted over impulses and actions -- the ability to stop yourself from having an emotional outburst, such as lashing out in anger or frustration. Although challenging, a child needs to develop the ability to think before acting and choose not to proceed with a negative or harmful action. With encouragement and patient instruction, you should start to see your child begin practicing the beginnings of self-control at a relatively early age.
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Baby Basics
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Although a baby expects to have what he wants immediately, babyhood is the stage that lays the foundation of self-control, states PBS on its website. When you stay tuned into your child̵7;s needs and meet them readily and consistently, you build trust as you teach your little one that he̵7;s important and valued. Firm limits, applied consistently, also build self-control in a small child as he grows, because he understands the rules and consequences.
Toddler Development
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As a baby moves into the toddler stage, he develops strong opinions about his needs and wants. With mobility, toddlers also experiment with increasing independence. This expanding independence makes safety an important issue because a youngster needs limits on activities to keep him safe from harm. A toddler is also developing cognitive skills that enable him to speak and understand speech. The youngster̵7;s language and motor skills develop in conjunction with the portion of the brain that regulates self-control, according to psychologist Anita Gurian of the New York University Child Study Center.
Preschool Development
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Sometime during the preschool period, a child will learn the beginnings of self-control, according to Laura Markham, a mother and clinical psychologist who blogs on her Aha! Parenting website. By the age of 4, approximately 30 percent of children have the ability to manage emotions that lead to impulses and actions on occasion. A child this age does not have mastery of these skills yet, so do not expect perfection.
Building Self-Control
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As a parent, you have a strong impact on your child̵7;s development of self-control. Start the basics of self-control mastery by identifying feelings with your child, suggests the National Association of School Psychologists. When you notice your child feeling happy, sad, frustrated, fearful or angry, name the emotion and talk about how it feels. Help your child understand that emotions and actions often have a link, but that he has a choice about his actions. Encourage your youngster to step back or take a break if he̵7;s feeling overwhelmed with a feeling. Doing so will help him make a positive choice about his actions, suggests Hannah Chancellor, a psychologist with Edwardsville Community Unit District Schools 7. Stay conscious of your own self-control also. Strive to maintain composure as you interact with your child and when your little one is watching. Your self-control is an important teaching tool because children learn much from example.
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