Ways Children Can Deal With Teasing

Teasing, even when it's meant in a good-spirited way, can have negative psychological consequences for children. Some children are very sensitive and have low self-esteem, others are prone to aggression and respond with violence to teasing. Helping children find positive and effective ways to deal with unwanted teasing can also help them learn important life skills and gain self confidence.

  1. Laugh

    • Nothing defuses an uncomfortable situation like humor. Teach your child to laugh at the teasing or teaser, even if she is hurt or offended inside. Laughing will take her mind off of hurt feelings and probably confuse or embarrass the teaser enough to make him go away. It will also help her gain perspective on the situation and teach her to laugh at situations that don't really matter. As long as your child believes what the teaser is saying isn't true or is just silly, she should laugh it off and ignore the teaser.

    Avoid the Teaser

    • Whether the teasing is hurtful or just annoying, getting away from it can be the best solution. Have your child pick another lunch table to sit at or recess group to play with. If your child is teased on the bus, have him sit in a different seat or put on headphones during the bus ride. If your child walks to school, map a different route. If your child is no longer as easily accessible to the teaser, she may give up.

    Ignore the Teaser

    • Most kids who tease others are looking for a reaction, whether it's anger, embarrassment or tears. Have your child practice giving a pained look, rolling her eyes and walking away. Or, teach her to simply not acknowledge the teaser. If he tries to interrupt her when talking, tell her to keep it civil: "Excuse me, I'm talking," and then turn back to the conversation. Ignoring a teaser or treating him with exasperated condescension can embarrass him into going away.

    Talk About the Teasing

    • If your child has succeeded in an outward show of indifference but cannot shake the internal effects, try talking about it. Encourage your child to talk to a teacher or counselor about the teasing. Ask him to tell you about the teasing and how it makes him feel. Urge him to confide in a good friend or teammate; they may be unaware of the teasing and come to your child's defense the next time it happens. Don't let your child bottle up negative feelings as a result of the teasing. Talking about it can help relieve feelings of anxiety, fear, sadness, depression and hurt.

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