What to Do When a Toddler Grabs

Grabbing from a Peer

• Toddlers, children between one and two years old, grab toys from other children because they have not yet learned the concept of sharing. According to the "Ask Dr. Sears" website, it is best to act as a referee when squabbles over favored toys come up. When one toddler grabs, you can observe to see whether the kids will work it out themselves. If tempers seem to be escalating, then you can step in and set the rules for who gets to play with the toy and for how long.

Grabbing Dangerous Items

• In the case of your toddler grabbing hot pans or sharp knives, the best plan of action is prevention, keeping sharp or hot kitchen implements well out of reach of little grabbing hands. "Ask Dr. Sears" suggests firmly telling your child ̶0;no,̶1; then offering an alternative, like an empty Tupperware bowl or wooden spoon, if your child tries to grab a knife or other item that you just do not want her to have. Help your toddler understand why she cannot have the pan or knife by saying ̶0;hot̶1; or ̶0;sharp.̶1;

Grabbing From a Sibling

• When your toddler grabs toys or snacks from a brother or sister, you can turn the moment into a learning opportunity. Telling him that grabbing was wrong, you can give him something to practice sharing with his sibling. For example, if he grabbed a snack, you can give him two portions and ask him to give one to his brother or sister. If he grabbed a toy, ask him to give it back and help him pick out a different toy.

Sharing

• Actively practicing sharing and playing sharing games with your toddler can include verbally pointing out when you are sharing food or other item with your spouse or another adult. You can take turns turning pages while reading bedtime stories with your toddler. When a playmate is coming for a visit, the "Zero to Three" website suggests helping your toddler choose and put away any special toys that she will not want to share, heading off any conflicts about them. If sharing toys becomes difficult, you can switch to an activity that does not involve toys, such as water or sand play or art projects.