Do Difficult Toddlers Become Difficult Kids?

The toddler stage gives your child opportunities to assert her independence. Sometimes, however, your toddler falls short of her objectives, and the frustration that ensues might seem overwhelming for both of you. By examining some of the developmental challenges specific to this stage of childhood development, you'll discover that a difficult toddler does not always grow into a difficult child.

  1. The Communication Conundrum

    • Toddlers reach communication milestones are various ages. A common source of frustration and behavioral meltdowns for your toddler occurs when she cannot express her needs in a manner that others can understand. Your toddler might use inappropriate behavior to communicate that she feels tired, angry or simply overwhelmed, according to the early childhood development website Zero to Three. Give your toddler gentle reminders to use language to communicate her needs, and model how to do so. For example, ̶0;I felt sad when I could not find your library book, so I asked you to help me find it.̶1;

    Acquiring Self-control

    • Poor self-control makes up another component of toddler development that contributes to behavioral challenges, and requires substantial practice from your toddler, and patience from you. Toddlers simultaneously struggle with expressive language and labeling emotions, so it should come as no surprise that this task reduces some toddlers to tears. Your toddler gains self-control as she gradually understands that you establish and enforce behavioral expectations consistently. Toddlers learn to make good choices when the rules and consequences that accompany them do not change.

    Feelings That Frighten

    • Experiencing strong emotions for the first time can frighten your toddler, who cannot label what she's feeling. When parents solve the mystery of new emotions for their toddler, feelings are less likely to elicit a negative response. Help your toddler label her feelings, and provide examples from your own experiences and everyday events to teach your little one how to identify her emotions. For example, ̶0;I am glad that we took a nap after visiting the park. Sometimes I feel cranky when I am feeling tired, and now I feel better.̶1;

    Training Toddler Tempers

    • Temper tantrums are a natural part of toddler development, peaking between 2 to 3 years, and becoming unusual after age 4, according to Medline Plus. Incidents of tantrum behavior wane as your toddler acquires self-control and communication skills. Transitions, fatigue and frustration are common triggers for tantrum behavior. Observe your toddler for variables associated with meltdowns, since preventing a tantrum trumps enduring one. Staying calm, offering distractions, providing choices and maintaining a sense of humor can help you and your toddler weather tantrums.

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