Topics for Reclusive Teenagers

Building Identity

• Solitude doesn̵7;t necessarily mean isolation, according to ParentsConnect.com. Reclusive teenagers may be seeking a quiet place to reflect on their emerging adult identity by writing, reading, thinking or creating art. Checking in with your teen helps affirm that you have noticed her reclusive behaviors without necessarily making judgments. Just asking what she̵7;s doing in her room could lead to an interesting conversation about new interests or topics she̵7;s been thinking about.

Communication

• Your teen could want to develop better social skills, but be unsure of how to begin. Reclusive behaviors, such as avoiding conversation and remaining physically isolated from others, could signal shyness. Assure your teen that many adolescents feel this way, although some are better at hiding it than others, as described by "Boston Globe" columnists Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar. Encourage your teen to sign up for an extracurricular activity, practice saying hello to classmates passing in the hallway or invite a friend for one-on-one activities such as visiting a park or watching a movie.

Depression

• Socially reclusive behaviors, such as spending too much time alone or rejecting previous friendships, could signal that your teen is suffering from depression. Depression affects as many as 2.5 percent of children and 8.3 percent of teens, according to Harvard Medical School. Parallel symptoms can include increased anger or hostility, threatening to run away from home, sustaining a poor attendance record at school or behaving recklessly. Take statements about suicide seriously, and consult with a professional if depression is suspected.

Anxiety

• Signs of socially related anxiety in teens include appearing dependent, withdrawn or uneasy in the company of others, according to the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry. Anxiety sometimes strikes a teen who doesn̵7;t feel comfortable with her changing body and emotions, or who hasn̵7;t fully adjusted to the social climate between childhood and adulthood. Surges of anxiety may result in acting shy or opting out of social situations. If your teen wants to talk about her anxieties, parents can listen respectfully without arguing the underlying logic. Situational anxiety might resolve itself with parental guidance, but circumstances lasting longer than six months should receive medical attention.

Destructive Behaviors

• Teens might be using alone time to pursue destructive behaviors, such as experimentation with substances or sex. Some teens hurt themselves intentionally through cutting, choking or other dangerous behaviors. Because socially withdrawn teens sometimes act out violently, it̵7;s crucial to identify and act on parental concerns that the reclusive behavior is a danger to the teen or to other people.