Downsizing With Teenagers

As much as downsizing hurts the breadwinners of the family, your teen might be the one who takes the change the hardest. Downsizing often means moving or changing your lifestyle, both of which can be devastating to your social-centric teenager. While it might be painful, it's a change that your family can get through as long you're willing to practice honesty, communication and a high degree of patience as your teen gets used to the idea of downsizing.

  1. Communication and Honesty

    • Your first reaction might be to protect your kids from the details of why you must downsize, but your teen wants to know, according to the Iowa State Cooperative Extension. Don't hide the truth -- give your teen plenty of time to make the adjustment and begin the mourning process for her old lifestyle. Keep the lines of communication open and be upfront for the reasons behind the changes, whether it's a lost job or a bid to save money. That way, your teen works with you -- not against you -- to prepare the rest of your family.

    Possible Reactions

    • Teens thrive on habit and social activity, two things that can be altered by downsizing. Expect your teen to balk at the idea and even become angry. In a 2009 New York Times article, writer Harvey Araton interviewed families with teens who had to downsize. Among some of the reactions, many of the teens felt betrayed, felt like they were being lied to about the status of their family's finances and position, and experienced feelings of loss and sadness. Give your teen plenty of time to grieve. Downsizing can seriously change his life and you can't expect him to accept your new lifestyle right away.

    Coping and Adjustment

    • Don't be too quick to pull the rug out from under your teen. Talk about your new life together, whether it's in a new home, city or job. Talk about some of the changes that will be made to your lifestyle and include your teen as much as possible in those choices so she doesn't feel like she's losing control. You can also use the time before making the change to gradually learn about your new life, like taking your teen to check out your new neighborhood, meeting new people and giving her plenty of time to say goodbye to her "old life."

    Being a Role Model

    • Parents can either help or hurt the transition to a downsized lifestyle. If you take the news hard and your teen sees the difficulty you have with the changes, he'll probably follow suit. While you don't have to be a complete optimist, model good behavior for your teen to follow. Express your feelings of disappointment, but try to look on the bright side of the change; new opportunities, less of a struggle to stay afloat and a new adventure for your family can help your teen see that downsizing may not be as traumatizing as first expected.

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