How to Make a Behavior Contract for Teens
As your children grow into teenagers and begin to gain freedom and independence, it becomes even more important for them to be able to make positive decisions on their own. The key to making good choices is being able to predict the outcome of your behavior. One method of teaching teens this necessary life skill is to create a behavior contract, which is a written agreement between parents and teens that outlines reasonable expectations for behavior and states clearly the consequences of the teen's choices. Behavior contracts are an effective means of correcting negative behavior when all parties consistently uphold the terms of the agreement.
Instructions
Arrange a time to meet with the adults who are responsible for enforcing rules and disciplining your teenager, such as a biological parent who lives outside the home or a stepparent. Discuss the issues that you are having with your teen. Allow everyone involved to offer input as different situations may arise with different caregivers. Behaviors that may be addressed include alcohol and drug use, car and phone use, dating, curfew, school performance and treatment of family members. Jot down ideas on paper as you brainstorm together. Finalize a list of pertinent issues and number the issues in order of importance. For example, potentially dangerous situations, such as drug and alcohol use, require more urgent attention than the amount of time your teenager spends on the phone. Narrow down the list down to no more than five behaviors that you want your teen to focus on improving. Include these behaviors in the initial contract and add others at a later date as your teenager progresses. Write a sentence for each behavior that states how your teen is expected to behave in a given situation. Format the sentence in first person perspective from your teenager̵7;s point of view. Utilize positive words and phrases. Decide on a positive consequence that will result when your teenager fulfills the expectation, such as a special privilege or a reward. You may also choose to simply list the natural consequences of good behavior, such as trust, respect, health and safety. Determine what the consequence will be if your teen fails to behave in the desired manner. Consider consequences that are effective with your child and appropriate to the behavior, as well as your ability to enforce the chosen discipline. List both the positive and negative consequences underneath each expectation. Establish the period of time for which the contract will be valid and note the date at the bottom of the contract. Create a chart with each expectation listed on the side and the days of the week across the top. Track your teen̵7;s behavior throughout the length of the contract by filling in the chart accordingly. Meet with all the adults, teens and pre-teens who are involved in the contract. Review the terms of the contract and clarify any questions that are presented. Allow the teens the opportunity to offer constructive feedback. Incorporate revisions as required to the contract. Have everyone sign and date the final draft of the contract. Make a copy of the contract for each participant. Utilize the behavior chart to monitor your teen̵7;s behavior on a daily basis. Enforce the terms of the contract consistently to achieve positive results. Revise the agreement accordingly upon expiration of the contract. New expectations can be added as your teen displays a consistent ability to make positive choices in situations addressed within the original contract.
