How to Discipline Teenage Girls for Breaking House Rules

Your teen becomes more independent every day, but that doesn't mean she can ignore your house rules. The rules that you set are put in place for her protection and your expectations, so when they're ignored and broken, it's a big deal. While it's important to discipline your daughter for misbehavior, it's also important that you do it correctly. While you'll still suffer slammed doors and dramatic displays, your teen will learn the most when you discipline effectively.

Instructions

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      Be clear as you create rules and expectations as well as the consequences for breaking the rules, suggests UC Davis Health Services. If your daughter doesn't know that using her cellphone after 11 p.m. merits the phone being taken away for a week, she won't be able to weigh the consequence against the behavior. You may want to write down the rules or have your teen sign a behavior contract so you're both clear on the rules and your teen knows exactly what to expect. Go over these verbally for further clarification.

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      Follow through with the punishment when your daughter breaks one of the house rules. The Fairfax County Public Schools Office of Special Education Instruction warns that nixing the punishment -- even if it's just once -- only teaches your daughter it's alright to break the rules and not suffer the consequences of her actions. She might be more prone to breaking the rules again, knowing that you won't punish her.

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      Focus on the behavior when you punish your daughter. Avoid making negative comments about her character or habits. If she misses her curfew, for instance, focus on punishment for breaking the rule and focus on why the rule is important. Making negative statements about her character, like "I can't ever trust you!" can hurt your daughter's self-esteem. Instead, try "Missing curfew upsets me, because it means I don't know if you're safe. Now I'll have to move your curfew up an hour for the rest of the week."

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      Talk to your daughter as her parent, not her best friend. While it may be tempting to be lenient about the house rules to be seen as the "cool mom," doing so could backfire and result in a teen who disrespects rules -- and you. Instead, let your teen know that you don't like disciplining her, but the rules are in place for a reason. FamilyEducation.com notes that maintaining clear parent-child boundaries creates a healthier relationship.

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      Allow your teen to petition for different house rules if she proves that she can follow the ones already in place. Discipline can be positive, so while you must punish for breaking the rules, you can also reward her for following the rules. If you ask your teen what she thinks are appropriate rules for things like chores, curfew or tech time, she might be more willing to listen up and follow rules that she helps create.

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