Funny Ways to Tell Your Kid Where Babies Come From

Ages and Answers

• The American Academy of Pediatricians recommends that parents start talking to their kids about sexuality long before they are actually thinking about having a romantic relationship. While you need to provide your older grade-schooler, middle school-aged child and teen with the facts about where babies come from, younger kids -- who aren't ready to truly understand sex yet -- may still ask questions that are similar to those that an older child would. Using a comical approach to telling your tot about where his little sister or brother came from or why mommy has a bump on her belly can help to cut the tension and make starting a discussion on this challenging subject almost entertaining.

Baby Delivery

• From the stork to Santa, the list of fantastical characters that deliver babies to good moms and dads is seemingly endless. If you are looking for a funny way to explain to your young child where babies come from, consider telling him that someone special delivers them. While this is, in its most basic form, true -- after all the OB does deliver babies -- change the story from the medical facts to a more whimsical approach. Jokingly tell your child that a big white bird -- aka the stork -- drops babies in the front yard -- the mailman brings babies along with the letters and magazines or that Santa delivers December babies on Christmas (See References, 3). If Santa isn't a staple in your family's belief system, try a non-religious approach and tell him that Mother Nature delivers babies to the cabbage patch or grows them on trees. Another option, especially with the growing popularity of Internet-based ordering, is to jokingly tell your little one that you ordered his baby brother at Amazon or another online site (See References, 3). Add that the UPS driver "delivers" the baby to your doorstep or directly to the hospital.

Babies 'R' Us

• If Toys 'R' Us sells toys, then what must Babies 'R' Us sell? Tell your toddler a funny tale about how some mommies pick up their babies in a special aisle at the infant super store or another similar shopping destination. Add another pinch of humor and tell your child that some parents only choose sale or discount kids or they have coupons to take a percentage of the price off of the baby.

Variations on Baby Making

• Even if your child isn't mature enough to hear, or understand, the actual mechanics behind conception, you can tell her a comically pared down version. Try an analogy such as mommy being a seed and daddy watering that "seed" or joke that mommy and daddy mix up a baby cake with special batter and magical sprinkles (See References, 4). For the more scientific tykes, try a petri dish explanation and tell your little one that the doctor mixes up the baby in a lab -- ala a Frankenstein-type of analogy -- and then puts it in mommy's tummy (See References, 4).