How to Discipline Your Child

Disciplining your child is a give and take dilemma. By providing too much to your child, it can leave him or her feeling inadequate or bristling with emotions her or she can't understand. By not giving enough discipline, the child has no standards that he or she is held accountable for. Therefore a balance must be struck. How much discipline should be invoked is dependent upon the disposition of the child. If the child personality is on the meek side, reprimanding him or her frequently would do little good. A stern talking to is preferable than a time out or a pat on the butt. In addition, positive reinforcement for the shy child may encourage him or her to adhere to a format that caters to his or her disposition.

On the other hand, a strong willed or stubborn child present concerns when discipline is used. Does he or she resent the parents for making them clean the mess they made? It is important to realize that despite what the child says at the time of reprimanding, he or she needs to know that their behavior will not be tolerated. A time out or taking away of a toy, and sticking to it, makes the child understand that their actions have consequences. To reiterate, it is imperative to stick to your guns. If the child knows that you will back down to them, then why should they listen to you in the first place?

Another important step is having open communication with your spouse. Both must be in agreement to the degree of punishment. Once the punishment has been handed down, both parties must abide by the decision, even if one of you disagrees with it. There will be time to discuss it after the discipline has been done. The important thing to understand is not to disagree openly about the action taken, unless is detrimental to the child. Children are smart. If they see an opening, they will try to pit one parent against another. It is pivotal that both parents are unified in their decision.

While that may seem obvious to some people, not everyone does it. I have seen first hand parents disagreeing about one of their decisions in front of their child. That should be done in private. I have disagreed with my spouse before, but did not say anything until we were alone and able to talk about it.