Considering Children's Needs When Relocating

Moving a few towns over, let alone several hundred miles away, can be stressful for any child. Though relocation may not always be by choice, it's best to provide your children with as much information as possible about the move, so they know what to expect before such a major transition. Sometimes, you won't know the answers to your child's questions, but that's when you can make a point of searching for information together.

  1. School Transitions

    • Give her as much information as possible about the new school schedule, rules, classes, etc., as well as pictures and brochures of the new school if she's unable to visit beforehand. If possible, try to enroll siblings in the same school, as this can help ease the nervousness of being a "new kid." Experts are divided on whether it's easier to start mid-year or in the fall. You may also consider choosing a school that's relatively similar to the one your child is currently attending, though this may not always be possible.

    Extracurricular Adjustments

    • If your child is involved in extracurricular activities, research the local clubs, studios and teams before relocating so he can get down to observing, auditioning, or trying-out once you arrive. Even if your child isn't deeply committed to a particular extracurricular activity, encourage him to join some structured program or class so he can meet other kids with shared interests. For an older child, finding common ground with kids can be tremendously valuable.

    Keep What You Can

    • It can be tempting to ditch old furniture and ratty toys when relocating, but losing all his familiar material objects can be especially unsettling for your child. Since that battered bunk bed and those thread-bare toys provide familiarity and some psychological comfort, it's best to hold off on tossing or replacing major items until your child feels more settled. If, for whatever reason, you can only take a limited number of items to your new home, let him help you choose which items make the cut.

    Provide Visuals

    • Between the internet and your realtor, you can provide your child with a pretty comprehensive picture of where you'll be moving. Encourage him to look not only at the new house and school, but also aerial images of your new neighborhood, the downtown area, shopping centers and, if applicable, your new place of worship. Search for video clips of your new town or city. The more information you provide, the better prepared your child will be, especially if you're relocating someplace very different. Be upbeat but don't go overboard -- older children can sense false enthusiasm.

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