Early Childhood Positive Discipline Techniques

There are lots of reasons young children misbehave. Children may act out if they experience any of the following: lack of patience, fatigue, hunger, desire to assert independence, confusion, disappointment or anxiety. They may have been rewarded for acting out in the past by getting what they want or receiving attention. Knowing why children misbehave helps parents and educators to discipline children using positive and effective early-childhood techniques.

  1. Connect through Conversation

    • Communication is the key to effective discipline. Communication needs to go both ways with both adult and child feeling understood. Affirm that you appreciate the child's frustrations. You can say things like, "I know cleaning up seems boring, but we'll both be happier in a clean room," or, "I want you to read your book even though it's hard." Make eye contact with the child to show empathy and respect.

    Demonstrate Love and Affection

    • Disciplinarians need to connect nurturing and affection to the disciplinary process. Children respond best when adults use "techniques that are authoritative rather than authoritarian and that offer the child free expression of affection...," according to psychologist Jan Jewett. Since children often misbehave because they feel disconnected from others, it's important that the disciplinary process affirm their value as members of the group.

    Separate Stress from Anger

    • Parents and educators often attribute misbehavior to children without fully assessing the child's actions in context. Adults must separate their own stress and anxiety from child misbehavior. Before taking disciplinary action, mentally check in with yourself to ensure you are not overreacting. Childhood development experts Ibtisam S. Barakat and Janet A. Clark suggest asking yourself questions like, "Did the child truly know what she did was wrong?" as part of this mental check-in process.

    Reorganize and Redirect

    • If a child misbehaves regularly during a certain time of day or when engaged in a certain activity, it's important to figure out why. Environmental factors play a major role in the behavior or young people. Restructure a daily routine if it normally gives the child trouble. Remove misbehavior-inducing objects from view. Distract the child from activities that may promote disruptive behavior.

    Be Proactive

    • Adults can prevent a great deal of misbehavior by proactively interacting with their children. Ideas for proactive discipline include: discovering the cause of misbehavior, using discipline to educate, rewarding self discipline and modeling anger management. These proactive measures help children learn to regulate their own actions consistently.

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