Facts on Verbal Abuse Toward Children

For many parents, yelling at children is a behavior learned from their own childhood and is nothing more than an expression of frustration stemming from a particular action by the child. However, for others, yelling and discipline easily cross the line into verbal abuse, as chiding turns into humiliation, scare tactics and downright cruelty. In these instances, the discipline is no longer effective and children instead learn to fear their parent and internalize the insults; in the end, these feelings can be destructive and begin a pattern that carries into adulthood.

  1. Identification

    • Verbal abuse toward children comes in many forms. It may mean someone is degrading the child, name-calling, threatening him, belittling him, trivializing his concerns or desires, criticizing him, nagging him, using racial slurs or inappropriate language. Parents that are overcritical of their children may engage in verbal abuse, as well as parents with substance abuse issues. Children may also encounter verbal abuse from siblings or other children at school.

    Effects

    • The effects of verbal abuse on children are far-reaching. They cause the child to internalize the abuse, so she feels like she is at fault or she believes what the abuser is saying to her. It may also cause the child to withdraw from her family and friends. She may fear going home, because she knows she will have to face further abuse. She may also shy away from adults in general, because she associates verbal abuse with all grown-ups.

    Additional Effects

    • Verbal abuse in childhood is strongly linked to depression, anger, hostility and disassociation in adults. In fact, the link between these issues and verbal abuse is as strong as the links between these mental issues and children that were subject to domestic abuse in the home, which showcases there is little difference in verbal and physical abuse when it comes to lasting effects on children.

    Statistics

    • Measuring the number of children in verbally abusive situations is challenging, because most cases are not reported until children are into adulthood. This is because adults no longer have the fears that children do of getting help, and they have the ability to get away from their abusers. According to a 1999 study published in the Archives of General Psychiatry, 24 percent of women reported childhood emotional abuse, under which verbal abuse falls.

    Treatment and Healing

    • Victims of childhood verbal abuse can benefit from professional counseling. Counselors can facilitate the process of working through painful memories and discharging the negative energy associated with the abuse. Moreover, counseling provides an opportunity to reconcile what happened and to learn to move past it. Victims of childhood verbal abuse should also ask for help from people in their inner circle, refrain from isolating themselves and try to take care of themselves physically.

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