How to Get My 4 Year Old to Go to Bed on His Own

Four-year-olds are wonderful little people. They've mastered the art of communication, they have imagination and they are bundles of perpetual energy. They can be shy and confident by turns; they understand directions but may not have the self-control to follow through without some supervision. Bedtime means giving up whatever activity has occurred just prior to going to bed, such as playing in their bath, watching a favorite TV show or listening to a book.

Things You'll Need

  • Picture book
  • Favorite toy or blanket
  • Night light

Instructions

    • 1

      Time the last meal of the day so that it is close to bedtime or offer a light snack about 30 minutes before beginning the going-to-bed ritual. Pre-schoolers -- and older people, too -- sleep better with a comfortably full stomach. Focus on calcium, chicken or unsweetened starch for pre-bedtime food; avoid caffeine, sugar and artificial dyes.

    • 2

      Schedule in some quiet fun as part of getting ready for bed. Have some toys in the bath, a toothbrush that has a cartoon character on the handle that you can talk about together, or give a choice of pajamas to wear to bed. Do not offer a choice about going to bed; that is a non-negotiable point.

    • 3

      Read aloud while you cuddle together. Turn off distracting entertainment items, or take the four-year-old to another room while you continue bedtime activities. Encourage older family members to turn down the volume or use headphones. Set a limit on the number of books that you will read, but let him choose the bedtime stories.

    • 4

      Tuck him in with his toy, blanket and a couple of the books. Leave a night-light on so he can continue to look at the books. Pull the door to his room partially closed, but open enough that he knows he is not alone. Check back in 30 minutes, and turn off the light.

    • 5

      Encourage him to become more independent as his fourth year progresses. Let him collect his special bedtime items and place them on his bed for himself. Give him his hug in the living room, and let him walk into his bedroom and climb into his bed on his own. Praise him the next morning or offer a small treat at breakfast the next day when he has gone to bed quietly on his own. Be patient with him and with yourself.

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