How to Discipline Without Nagging

No one likes to be nagged, so why should your child feel any different? If she seems to be tuning you out, it could very well be that you are nagging too much. Often in an attempt to stop nagging, parents take the polite approach and become too friendly towards their children, according to Diane Debrovner in her article, "The 5-Second Discipline Fix," published on Parents.com. Parents present their requests in the form of a question, which presents another problem -- you're unknowingly setting up a situation where your child can choose not to comply.

Instructions

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      Phrase your requests as statements, rather than questions, suggests Debrovner. Instead of, "Would you like to clean up your toys now?" say, "Clean up your toys now, please." Or, "I am setting the five-minute timer. When it goes off, it is time to clean up your toys." These are direct requests that require your child to comply.

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      Establish consequences for non-compliance and follow through. For example, if your daughter continues to play after the timer goes off, the consequence could be that she loses her favorite toy for the rest of the day. If she is being told to clean up before dinner, she could lose her dessert; if it's before bedtime, she could lose a story or have to go to bed 10 minutes early. Simply state what the consequence is and enforce it; don't get into a power struggle or defend your authority. Let the consequence speak for you.

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      Be consistent as this will prevent nagging. When children understand that their parents are serious about what they say and consequences will be enforced, they will be more likely to want to do what is required of them. Dr. Laura Markham, clinical psychologist and author of "Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids," recommends giving your child choices, as it will give him a sense of control over his life. Before you do, make sure they are choices you can handle as his parent. Giving choices such as choosing between cereal or scrambled eggs for breakfast or what book he wants to read at bedtime are choices that a young child can build on as he matures.

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