Effective Punishment
Effective Punishment
Punishment tells a child what not to do, but it doesn't tell him what to do instead. Let's be honest. You've tried every form of punishment you can think of to get things to change and, so far, how well has it worked? Punishment doesn't teach a better, more appropriate alternative. It must be paired with information and feedback about what to do, not just what not to do. Don't get me wrong. Some kids seem to get the message with just one or two redirections (my euphemism for punishment). But you're not reading this book because you're raising that child. You're raising the child who makes you wonder if you'll ever get through to him.
Rules for Effective Punishment
Effective punishment:
- Is preceded by a warning.
- Has a set beginning and end.
- Happens immediately.
- Occurs at maximum intensity (does not increase in intensity or duration for additional infractions).
- Is enforceable wherever your child is when the misbehavior occurs.
- Is delivered in a matter-of-fact tone.
- Is imposed every time that behavior occurs.
- Is always accompanied by acknowledgment of the appropriate behaviors he should be demonstrating.
-
Q My son is a fourteen-year-old high-school freshman who is a constant target for other students, both physically and verbally. He is now called ethnic slurs because these children think that he is Spanish. He is failing his freshman year and I am in
-
Q My seven-year-old has been using profanity that he doesnt even understand. His friends in first grade are creating vulgar poems and songs with words they dont know the meaning of. His school has a zero tolerance policy and he is getting into troubl
-
Chores are a daunting family task. Everything has to be put in order and cleaned, and getting the kids to help out is a task in itself. Discouragement results in the continuing argument to try to get children to do chores, leaving the parents to do c
