How to Help an Angry 5 Year Old Girl

Anger is often a symptom of sadness, stress, frustration or fear. When your child is angry, she's trying to tell you that something is wrong in her world. A limited vocabulary may cripple your child's ability to talk about her anger in a productive way. By teaching your child some coping skills, showing love and communicating with her about her anger, you help her learn how to remain calm and control her feelings

Things You'll Need

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Instructions

    • 1

      Remain calm; don't let her anger upset you. Be an example of patience and composure when you are angry.

    • 2

      Communicate with your daughter. If a major change has happened in her life recently, such as a move or a newborn sibling, she may feel frustrated or upset that her life is different now. Talk to her about the way she feels and encourage ongoing open communication.

    • 3

      Determine what triggers her angry outbursts and diffuse problems before they start whenever possible. If she gets angry when her brother takes her toys, keep him out of her bedroom. If being forced to quit playing so she can take a bath makes her furious, give her 10-, 5- and 1-minute warnings.

    • 4

      Ignore inappropriate behavior, such as throwing herself on her bed or kicking and screaming, if possible. She needs to release her anger and should be allowed to do so as long as there's no danger.

    • 5

      Set limits. Inform your child of rules, such as no hitting, kicking or slamming doors. Let her know that she will have a time-out if she breaks these rules.

    • 6

      Connect with your child emotionally and physically. Get on her level, give her a hug and talk to her lovingly.

    • 7

      Explain that you understand she's angry. Sometimes children need others to understand how they feel. Use words like, "I know you're upset and I'm sorry you feel so frustrated. Let's see if we can fix it together."

    • 8

      Remove your child from the situation immediately if her behavior is destructive or puts herself or anyone else in danger. Kicking, biting, hitting and throwing things necessitate a 5 minute time-out. Explain to the child why she must have a time-out, place her on her bed or another secluded spot in the house and walk away. Continue to put her back in time-out if she gets up and restart the 5 minutes. When time is up, remind her why she needed to be alone, ask her to apologize and allow her to play again.

    • 9

      Encourage your child to use words instead of violence when she is angry. Say, "It is fine to feel angry, but it's not appropriate to hit other people. Can you tell me why you're mad?"

    • 10

      Ask your child how she would feel if someone hit, bit or kicked her. Explain that she might hurt other people because of her anger.

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