The Disadvantages of Rewarding Children

Parenting experts often advocate a reward system for changing problematic behavior in children. The idea is that by reinforcing positive behavior with something the child likes --- a bedtime story, a trip to the park, or even money or a toy --- the child is more likely to sustain the desired behavior. However, some child care experts believe that a reward system can be detrimental to a child's intellectual and social development and is ineffective in the long run.

  1. Rewards are an Easy Fix

    • When parents correct a child's behavior by offering a reward as an incentive, they miss an opportunity to learn about and address the underlying reasons for the negative behavior. A reward may convince a child to go to bed early, but won't address the root problem: is the child afraid of bad dreams? Is the child hyper from eating too much sugar? A parent may never find out, because the child will simply comply to get the treat.

    Rewards Can Stifle Creativity

    • Studies have shown that when a child is motivated only by a desire to receive a reward, they are less likely to be creative, take risks and have fun with the "chore." The activity becomes a task that the child must get through to win a "prize" not an opportunity to learn discipline or gain a feeling of accomplishment and self-worth.

    Rewards Can Create Competition

    • Reward systems can create jealousy among students or siblings. Having a visible and tangible "prize" is more likely to make a child a target for envy, and discourage cooperation and collaboration among peers.

    Reward Systems Breed Manipulative Kids

    • Instead of authentic interactions with children, you're teaching them how to act a role to get a reward. Children are often quick to guess what a parent wants to see or hear, and may misrepresent themselves to get the rewards, setting up a pattern that could potentially carry over into adult relationships. It essentially conditions a child to jump through hoops to comply with the wishes of an authority figure.

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