What Are the Benefits of Teaching Children the Meaning of the Word No?
It's not always easy to tell your children "no" when they want something, especially when you're not feeling like dealing with a struggle or a temper tantrum. But despite the difficulties, it's crucial for children to learn the meaning of the word no. Teaching them otherwise will only result in difficulties, power struggles and, possibly, the development of confusion and internal chaos, says licensed marriage and family therapist Lori Freson in an interview on the financial planning website LearnVest.
-
Respect for Authority
-
Children who learn the meaning of the world "no" realize that they aren't the kings and queens of the castle. They learn to respect authority and realize that they can't have and get away with everything they want. The more you go along with and give in to your child's demands, the more you'll find yourself bending the rules and giving in over time -- and the more your authority will be compromised, says parenting expert and social worker James Lehman in an article for the Empowering Parents website.
Limits and Boundaries
-
Children need to understand that there are limits and boundaries that cannot be crossed. Limits teach children self-discipline, says psychologist Dr. Laura Markham in an article for Aha! Parenting.com. By teaching your child the meaning of the word "no," you help her learn appropriate boundaries and limits. This can lead to the development of an increased ability to tolerate frustration and develop satisfying relationships based on "give-and-take" later on in life. You can say "no" with empathy by explaining that you understand that she really wants something, but that it's just not possible. You don't need to -- and shouldn't -- be too authoritarian, but it does mean that once you make the rules, you need to stick with them.
Impulse Control
-
Impulse control is the ability to delay gratification and avoid acting on impulses and desires without regard for future consequences. Children who learn impulse control know that they can't have everything they want when they want it. They learn that sometimes, saying "no" at the moment can lead to greater benefits and rewards in the future. According to an article about positive ways to deny your children's wants for the Ask Dr. Sears website, children who learn the meaning of the word "no" may develop an improved internal ability to control their impulses and delay immediate gratification.
Safety
-
Saying "no" alerts children to the possibility of danger or inappropriate behaviors. When children learn the meaning of the word "no," they understand that you might have some very good reasons for denying their request or desire. Children learn appropriate behaviors, like it's not OK to hit another child or to cross the street without looking both ways, when you are firm and consistent. Making exceptions creates confusion and teaches children that perhaps inappropriate or unsafe behavior can be approved "some" of the time. Teaching the meaning of the word "no" and providing a simple explanation lets your child know the reasons why certain actions are prohibited and why misbehavior is unacceptable.
-
-
Children are often sensitive in ways that are difficult to deal with. Many children will react emotionally to events that justify such a response, such as bullying or falling down. Some children, however, will cry or throw a fit when minor inconvenie
-
Also known as tantrums, emotional meltdowns are common for children between the ages of one through four. While these outbursts generally last between 30 seconds and a couple of minutes, some take much longer to subside. Tantrums are a completely nat
-
While you may not think twice about greeting friends and acquaintances with a friendly “hi” or “hello,” your child may not understand how or why to greet others. Provide your child with engaging and informative guidance to tea
