Early Childhood Rewards & Punishments

Nonphysical Rewards

• A reward doesn̵7;t have to be a physical object to be effective. Praise is one of the best forms of rewards. It helps boost your child̵7;s self-esteem and makes him feel capable and strong. Praise your child frequently -- just be genuine and honest when you do. Be specific and praise specific actions or behaviors. For example, say ̶0;You did terrific at your swim meet̶1; instead of labeling your child ̶0;Good.̶1; Pats on the back, high fives, hugs, smiles and kisses are also wonderful rewards for your child.

Physical Rewards

• Some physical rewards can also help reinforce positive behavior. Stickers and sticker charts work well for children. A bin of small trinkets also works, especially for young children that are potty training. Collect temporary tattoos, plastic rings, crayons and small toy cars in a small plastic container and offer your child a little prize after good behavior choices, such as picking up his toys without being told.

Time-Out

• A time-out can be used to remove your child from a situation and give him time to calm down. This form of punishment works best for a preschooler-aged child, but can also be used for toddlers and older children. Establish which behaviors warrant a time-out and give your child one warning. If the negative behavior doesn̵7;t stop, remove him from the situation to a safe area away from others that isn̵7;t very fun, such as a chair in a hallway. The American Academy of Pediatrics suggests a duration that is your child̵7;s age in minutes, plus one minute. Set a timer and distance yourself from your child during this time. Ignore any yelling, screaming or tantrums while he̵7;s in time-out, unless he is putting himself in danger or damaging property.

Natural Consequences

• A natural consequence is a self-imposed punishment that also offers a valuable lesson on life. He will learn that if he does a certain behavior, an undesirable scenario may result. For example, if he hits his friend, the friend won̵7;t play with him. When he stomps on his favorite truck when he̵7;s mad, his toy will break. When he gets upset, you can talk him through the situation, point out how his actions caused this undesirable result and discuss what he can do next time to avoid this.

Loss of Privileges

• Take away certain items that your child values if he is acting poorly. For example, revoking his TV privileges for the afternoon may work. The AAP points out that you should follow through when you promise you will remove something. Take the privilege away immediately after the negative behavior so he ties the loss of the privilege with his bad behavior. You should never withhold items that your child needs, such as meals.