How to Teach a Child to be More Assertive

One of the toughest things to handle as a parent is how to teach your child to stand up for herself, particularly when it comes to peer pressure and bullying. But if you start early, you can provide her the tools and the confidence to become an assertive person. It is especially challenging but most important with shy, passive children. Read on to learn how to teach a child to be more assertive.

Instructions

    • 1

      Be a model for your child by exhibiting assertive behavior around him whenever possible. Children learn best from your example.

    • 2

      Allow your child to handle situations, which call for assertive behavior. If you swoop in to save the day all the time, she never learns to do it herself. Instead she ends up relying on you and others to stand up for her.

    • 3

      Teach your child different ways of saying no to peer pressure. He may rather say, "No, it's too stupid or dangerous," than "No, my mom won't let me." Standing up for yourself is standing up for your values and beliefs. Make sure he knows that he may disappoint himself by not following his beliefs.

    • 4

      Work with your child on using an effective tone of voice when trying to be assertive. Suggest using a strong, firm tone without yelling or sounding angry. She can sound friendly yet assertive at the same time.

    • 5

      Exhibit confident, assertive body language for your child. Role play with him. Assertive people hold their heads high, have direct eye contact and don't waver in their words.

    • 6

      Encourage your child to stand his ground against bullies, even though it is not easy. Tell him not to give up his toy willingly, not to let a bully get away with knocking down his castle or snatching his snack.

    • 7

      Explain that being assertive is entirely different than being aggressive or exhibiting bullying behavior. Explain the difference between assertive and passive behavior.

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