Options for Gay & Lesbian Couples to Have Children

Adoption

• No hard statistics exist for exactly how many gay and lesbian couples have adopted children, but the 2007 Urban Institute study estimates that 65,500 adopted children -- over 4 percent of all United States adoptions -- are being raised by gays and lesbians. This number includes private, public and international adoptions, as well as adoptions of a partner's child. As many as 2 million gay, lesbian and bisexual individuals may have an interest in adopting. While adoption may be a method of becoming a parent for some homosexual couples, this option is not available to all. At the time of publication, five states -- Florida, Mississippi, Nebraska, Michigan and Utah -- have passed laws limiting the ability of gays and lesbians to adopt.

Foster Parenting

• Almost 3 percent of all children in foster care in the United States -- a little over 14,100 children -- reside in gay and lesbian households, according to the 2007 Urban Institute study. Six percent of foster children placed with nonrelatives have gay and lesbian foster parents. Gays and lesbians can help provide homes for the half-million children in the United States needing foster care and prove particularly beneficial when offering a home to a relative's child, so that the child doesn't have to live with a stranger, or being willing to take in foster children who identify as homosexual or bisexual. However, at the time of publication, Nebraska, Utah and Arkansas have passed laws restricting the ability of gays and lesbians to become foster parents.

Artificial Insemination

• Lesbians who want children may choose to become pregnant. Some may use a sperm bank, though this can be an expensive option. Rainbow Flag Health Services, the only North American sperm bank that deliberately recruits gay and bisexual sperm donors, charges a $250 fee for semen and then another $165 to $285 to ship the sample if necessary. If a woman requires more than one attempt to become pregnant, the costs can quickly add up. To save money, some lesbians choose to use a known sperm donor and inseminate themselves at home. According to reproductive endocrinologist Dr. Snunit Ben-Ozer, this method only has a 5 to 12 percent per-month success rate, but it does have the potential benefit of allowing the child to know her father and any siblings she has.

Surrogacy

• Gay men may choose to have a biological child through a surrogate. They may use a traditional surrogate, where the surrogate provides her own egg, or a gestational surrogate, where the couple must also find an egg donor. Most of the time, just one father provides the sperm, but it isn't unusual for sperm to be taken from both partners. Occasionally lesbian couples will use a surrogate as well, but this option is less common. With two women, it is unlikely that both would suffer from fertility problems. To reduce the expense and avoid the prejudice that may make finding a surrogate difficult, some gay and lesbian couples choose to use a family member as their surrogate.