Adoption Vs. Having Your Own Kids

Choice of Ages

• When choosing to adopt, a family can decide to bypass the infant years of colic, endless diapers and sleepless nights. Adoptive children can be chosen at any age, all the way through the teen years. You may have a teen of your own who would benefit from a same-age companion. Children who are already school-aged may fit into your work schedule much better than infants and toddlers. But some parents love the routine of a new infant in the home complete with the various stages of physical and psychological developments in close succession. The midnight feedings, first steps and the recognition of family traits may lead them to prefer to have natural children of their own.

Multiple Children

• You can get all of your additions to your family out of the way at once by adopting a sibling group. Sibling groups can be much more difficult to place, but some families with larger homes -- and larger hearts -- make room in their lives for multiple children of varying ages. This instant family group can be a major challenge, but the efforts put into nurturing and teaching these children will be priceless experience. It is important to have some prior knowledge and hands-on experience in parenting before taking this on to ensure the success of this endeavor. Other parents may prefer to have their own children, one at a time, so they can celebrate each individual milestone and personality. They can compare the different speeds and ways in which the children develop and celebrate both their individuality and common family traits.

Childbirth

• Some women cannot have children, or the very idea of childbirth may terrify them. Adoption is an option to skipping this step in acquiring a family. Fertility tests and treatments, the discomforts of pregnancy, wearing maternity clothes, and the expense of doctor's visits and hospital stays will be eliminated if a couple decides to adopt instead; however, adoption can be expensive as well. But some women treasure every moment of the childbearing process. They may even keep journals of their every day experiences to remind them how blessed they are to be able to carry and nurture an infant for nine months. Many will deliberately choose natural childbirth so they can have their children even with all the pains and discomforts that the experience brings.

Gene Pools

• If you are set on maintaining your family's gene pool for centuries to come, then adoption may not be the path for you. Adopted children, although they come with family histories, will not have the same genetic makeup as your natural children. There may be abnormalities or mental issues that run in their birth families that may not be apparent from the short biological information provided at the time of adoption. Children can be chosen with your coloring and stature, but they are not biologically connected to you unless they were born to a relative. Parents may also choose to have their own children to carry on the family name and physical and personality traits. Specific attributes such as scientific ability, athleticism, stature or blue eyes may be examples of physical goals of natural children.

Bonding

• Without that new baby bonding, it may take time for adopted children to bond with their new parents. Some never do, and that is a risk that prospective parents take when they adopt. According to a study published in the book "Clinical and Practice Issues in Adoption," 80 percent of all adoptions are successful. It sometimes takes months or even years for children to form attachments to their new families, and the age of the child plays a large part in the success of bonding. The older the child, the more difficult a process it becomes. Parents may find it easier to bond with a natural child that is in their arms within minutes of his birth. The attachments already formed during the pregnancy may assist in promoting feelings of closeness and love.