How to Help Shy Teen Girls Make Friends

Not every teen girl wants to or can be the life of the party -- the girl that everyone loves and the girl that̵7;s friends with everyone. There is nothing wrong with being shy, though it does make it more difficult for your daughter to make new friends. Additionally, others might mistake her shyness for snobbery, which could cause them to avoid befriending your daughter.

Instructions

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      Refrain from referring to your daughter as a shy person. Instead, refer to her as having a shy personality, advises Disney Family. What your daughter hears you say about her can very easily become what she sees in herself. For example, if you constantly refer to your daughter as selfish, she̵7;s more likely to believe she really is selfish and begin to behave that way regularly as she believes it̵7;s what she is. The same goes for being shy.

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      Encourage your daughter to make eye contact and say hello to others, advises Eileen Kennedy-Moore, Ph.D., New Jersey-based psychologist and author. This is one of the easiest and most basic ways to strike up a conversation with new people, which can lead to extended discussion and in turn can lead to friendship. If there is someone your daughter would like to befriend, tell her that the easiest way to make that happen is simply to say hello while making eye contact and smiling. Practice with her, if you think it will help.

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      Allow your teen to start small when it comes to making new friends, advises Bernardo Carducci, Ph.D., author and director of the Shyness Research Center at Indiana University. Don̵7;t sign her up for a dozen different classes and teams in hopes that she will meet a bunch of teens who are into the same activities. Instead, allow her to try socializing and overcoming her shyness by joining a small group, such as a study group or a book club. She̵7;s more likely to feel more at ease around just a few teens who have something in common.

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      Encourage your teen to give compliments to those she would like to befriend, advises Kennedy-Moore. People naturally appreciate genuine compliments, even from people they may not know particularly well. Additionally, a compliment with an open-ended question can actually begin an entire conversation. For example, if your daughter thinks another girl̵7;s bracelet is really cool, encourage her to tell the girl that she likes her bracelet and then to ask her where she bought it. This could lead to a conversation about the place she bought it while on a trip with her family. This can start an entirely new conversation and spark a friendship.

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