How to Stop a Teen From Running Your Household

Living with a moody teenager can be a lot like walking through a minefield -- you never know when something will set her off. It is possible, though, to make your home a peaceful haven in spite of the great hormonal shift taking place under your roof. Instead of spending your child̵7;s teen years walking on eggshells, you can make a plan and create boundaries that will benefit everyone in the long run.

Instructions

    • 1

      Clearly communicate your expectations to your teen to avoid nagging and repeating yourself. Make the expectations apply to each child in the household. Say, ̶0;I will only wash clothes that you put in the hamper̶1; or ̶0;Your allowance has to last for two weeks. I will not give you extra money if you run out before then.̶1; Hold your teenager accountable for repairing items broken in anger or for verbal assaults on siblings.

    • 2

      Follow through on your consequences and use outcomes that are important to your child. Be consistent so your teenager knows that she cannot get away with intentional disobedience. Let her feel the sting of having no clean laundry on Monday morning because she left it all on the floor or not getting to go to the movies Saturday night, because she missed curfew the night before. Avoid arguing about the consequences -- allow your teen to experience the effects of her behavior.

    • 3

      Reward your teenager̵7;s behavior, creating positive consequences alongside negative ones. Give her a later curfew on Friday night when your teen takes out the trash all week without being reminded or offer to pay for the popcorn at the movies if your teen is being careful with her money. Remain open to your child̵7;s requests when she is making an effort to keep the peace at home and rise to your expectations.

    • 4

      Stay connected to your teen through her emotionally rocky years. Encourage her to develop her own interests and talents instead of only the things that you want for her. Listen to her problems when she feels like talking -- even if it is during the wee hours of the morning -- and resist telling her what to do about every situation. Be willing to stop what you are doing if your teen wants to talk. Guide her through possible outcomes so she can learn to make her own decisions.

    • 5

      Spend one-on-one time with your teenager every day. Incorporate face-to-face time while clearing the table after supper, in the car after soccer practice or having a scoop of frozen yogurt before bedtime. Try playing a video game together or shooting hoops in the driveway if your teen resists talking to you at first. Remain focused on your child and do not allow your phone or the television to distract you.

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