Acceptance in Teens

Acceptance is a critical aspect of being a teenager and it is very important for teens of all races and cultures, regardless of gender. Teenagers who have difficulty with acceptance may be more likely to become bullies or get involved in gangs or other destructive cliques. Whether a teenager wants to be part of a group or just wants to be accepted as an individual with unique characteristics, learning to give and receive acceptance is integral to becoming a successful, well-adjusted adult.

  1. Self-Acceptance

    • Acceptance of others begins with accepting oneself, so it is important to teach a teen to understand himself in order to increase his empathy towards other people. Psychologist and author Dr. Arlyn Roffman, Ph.D., states that parents can help teens see the "bigger picture" and help them recognize both the strengths and weaknesses in themselves. If you teach a teen to focus on his positive traits and not his limitations, he will be more accepting of himself and will learn to recognize the value in others' unique characteristics.

    Celebrate Differences

    • Teaching teens to value unique characteristics in others will help them to become more accepting of other people and of themselves. Having teens volunteer to teach younger students may help them to learn tolerance, for example. A study published by the "Journal of Extension" in 2001 found that teens who participated in cross teaching, or teaching children younger than themselves, had greater achievement, better conflict/resolution skills and more empathy. Many schools have mentoring or volunteering programs in which teens can get involved, and in many cases, they may receive school credit for their volunteerism.

    Monitor Friendships

    • Peer groups and friends can have a real impact on how a teen views and accepts others or himself. Monitor your teens' friendships and online interactions to ensure they are not involved in a negative or intolerant group that may have a negative influence.

    Communicate Openly

    • Use opportunities that occur in every day life to start a conversation with teens about acceptance. Use news stories to point out the consequences of intolerance or a lack of acceptance and how they directly and indirectly affect individuals or society.

    Model Acceptance

    • Teens look to adults for cues when it comes to learning behavioral characteristics. If you want your teens to learn acceptance skills, be sure to demonstrate acceptance of others. Point out how differences make people unique and how they could benefit society.

    Reward Positive Behavior

    • Give your teens positive reinforcement when they demonstrate acceptance. For instance, if they tell you they helped another student out at school who was being bullied or you observe them demonstrating acceptance, give them positive, verbal praise and encourage them to continue the behavior.

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