How to Become Successful as a Single Parent
Raising kids alone is demanding. Single parents feel stress and don't have the built-in support system that a partner offers. The Federal Interagency Forum on Child and Family Statistics reports the number of two-parent families shows a gradual decline from 1980 through 2012. Twenty-four percent of kids lived with a single-parenting mom, and only 4 percent with a solo dad, in 2012. The nearly one-quarter of all parents taking individual duties for child rearing have pressure to make a home that offers all the same opportunities and benefits as a dual-adult household. This takes complex planning, and involving your children as helpers in building and maintaining the family.
Instructions
Establish a formal weekly schedule that makes time for your children, but also sets aside a small amount of personal time for yourself. Make parenting your first and most important goal to achieve success. Write a set of home rules with input from your children, and then enforce the regulations with consistency. If you share joint-parenting duties, encourage your kids to use the rules you establish when they stay with a former partner or relatives. Formal rules avoid confrontations and help quickly settle family disputes. Model the behavior you expect your kids to follow, including following house rules for dating and appropriate language use. Your children follow your example and look to see how you handle emotional and social situations, according to Karen Stevens, director of the Illinois State University Child Care Center. Don't be afraid to show emotions, but model the management you want your children to learn. Keep your sense of humor and don't try to set yourself up as superhuman. Admit big mistakes and ask your children to help you solve important problems that involve the family. Scholastic encourages parents to focus on being "good enough," since it's a rare parent that takes the award for perfection. Express unconditional love and affection for your children, but avoid equating love with consumerism or comparing the amount of love you give to each of your kids. Make gender and age accommodations when expressing your affection for your children in public. Research done by Christopher Daddis, assistant professor of psychology at Ohio State University at Marion, found teen girls share more about dating compared with boys, for example. Some boys also prefer that physical displays of affection be made at home, according to psychologist and author Dr Carl Pickhardt. Join a real-time or online parents support group to bounce ideas off other parents and to vent about stress. The Mayo Clinic encourages single parents to lean on other single parents for support. Arrange for quality and reliable child care. Investigate formal after-school activities, sports and lessons for your children to enhance skills and talents and give supervised time when you're not with them. Look also for opportunities for your children to bond with role models from members of the opposite sex, according to the Kansas Children's Service League.
