How to Discipline an Unruly Child

Discipline is extremely important for all children, whether they're unruly or not. Children do not learn right from wrong on their own. Rather, they need to be taught from a young age in order to internalize these values as they grow up. What's more, they need to be disciplined rather than simply told right from wrong because their actions need to have tangible consequences. If you discipline children, you are making your values clear through your actions, which speak much louder than words.

Instructions

    • 1

      Tell your child exactly what you expect of him. This should not be a long list of rules, but rather just a few broad, key values that you expect him to follow. "Don't be mean to people" is a good one, as is "Don't do things that aren't safe."

    • 2

      Choose your battles. Not every negative behavior needs to be dealt with. For example, you probably should discipline your child if he throws his food across the room at dinner time. But if he uses his fingers to pick up a piece of potato one time, you can let it go. You could say something if he does it over and over, but disciplining every single little one-off thing will just exhaust you and alienate your child, thus making him more unruly.

    • 3

      Discipline your child immediately after he misbehaves. There has to be a clear connection between the behavior and the consequence; if you wait for an hour, he won't make the connection as clearly and therefore won't internalize the correct behavior as effectively.

    • 4

      Create a consequence that directly correlates with your child. There's no one single consequence that works for everyone. Rather, you need to look at your child, what his likes and dislikes are, and make a consequence based on this. If, for example, he likes being the center of attention, put him in a room by himself for a few minutes if he misbehaves. If he likes reading comic books, take them away for a day when he misbehaves.

    • 5

      Use positive reinforcement. Rather than constantly being on him for doing the wrong thing, praise him when he does the right thing.

    • 6

      Avoid situations where you know you are going to have to discipline him. It is easier to be proactive than it is to be reactive. If he always acts up in the supermarket because he's hungry and cranky, give him a snack before taking him to the store, or do your shopping before you pick him up.

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