Parenting Plans for Married People

Parenting plans are often used by moms and dads who are divorced or don't live together, as it's important that parents work together as much as possible. However, there is no reason that parents who are married to each other can't have a parenting plan as well. In fact, outlining who is responsible for what can prevent misunderstandings and arguments.

  1. Be Realistic

    • Sit down with your spouse and take a realistic look at how much time each of you has available to handle childcare, as well as what your strengths are. For example, if one of you works part-time and the other full-time, it makes sense that more childcare responsibilities will fall on the parent who is home more often. If one parent has a knack for cooking and enjoys it, this parent may handle more of the meal preparation for the family.

    List Tasks

    • Make a list detailing all of the tasks involved in raising children, such as diaper changes, feedings, taking your preschooler to school or your older child to soccer practice, suggests Children In the Middle.com. Try to cover as many tasks as you can think of that need to be done. You also want to list issues that may arise, such as how to choose schools for the kids, as well as religious issues. Decide who will have the final say if you and your spouse disagree. For example, if one of you is devoutly religious, and the other parent doesn't care much either way, perhaps the parent who finds the children's religion more important should have final say.

    Delegate the Responsibilities

    • Now that you know who has what time available and what needs to be done, it's time to delegate responsibility. Maybe the parent who leaves for work later can drop the children at school or daycare, and the parent who gets home earlier can pick them up and start dinner. If you have a baby who is being formula fed, perhaps you can alternate nighttime feedings with your spouse. If you are breastfeeding, your spouse can handle the baby for an hour or two in the evening, so you can have a nap.

    Be Flexible With Your Spouse

    • Even the best parenting plan may need tweaking from time to time, so remember to be flexible. What works one month may be less effective the next month, and responsibilities may change as kids get older, you have more children or work responsibilities change. Keep communicating with your partner about what is working for you and what isn't.

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